


Nightmares

by thisisamadhouse



Series: Nightmares verse [1]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Missing Year (Once Upon a Time)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-24
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2019-03-09 00:17:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13469667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisisamadhouse/pseuds/thisisamadhouse
Summary: In which Robin finds out what kind of demons Regina deals with night and day and tries to help (pre OQ + Dimple Queen, early Missing Year, mentions of Regina's marriage to the King)





	Nightmares

**Author's Note:**

> I'm slowly importing my work to this site. It is very strange to go through them again, but in a good way. This one is almost 3 years old, and part of a series of several one-shots, it's also one of the first prompts I ever received on Tumblr, so it's special to me.

A blood-curling scream. That was what made Robin burst into the Queen’s rooms at close to midnight during his assigned rounds barely a week after they had taken the Dark Palace back from the Wicked Witch. 

  
He was certain she was being attacked until he realised there was no one else there apart from the two of them. She was thrashing, whimpering on her bed, uttering the word “no” over and over again. Whatever or whoever she was trying to get away from didn’t seem to be about to leave her alone anytime soon, and Robin couldn’t possibly slip away while she was in such a state.

  
He did the only thing he could think of, and approached the four-poster bed to wake her up. He called her name several times with no reaction, too far gone in her nightmare as she was. Finally, he touched her, and it worked- too well so. Her hand caught his wrist, sharp nails digging into the offending appendage before her eyes opened widely. They were unfocused, glazed, and she looked terrified. Her breathing was shallow. She didn’t seem to be able to get enough air, but as soon as her dark orbs settled on his form she let go of his arm and scooted to the far end of the bed in a panic. Her long hair hid half of her face, and his fingers itched to push the flowing tresses behind her ear if only it could help to ground her back in the present.

  
“Milady, it’s only me, Robin. You had a nightmare. It’s over. Listen to me, it’s over, it was just a bad dream.” He wasn’t sure if using the kind of words and tone he usually reserved for reassuring Roland after one of his nightmares was the right thing to do, but at least she seemed to recognize him. “It was a nightmare, nothing is hurting you anymore.”

  
She flinched and looked around the room, eyes lingering on the bed’s empty space. “It’s not the same room.” She muttered, frowning.

  
“Milady?” Robin asked, confused, uncertain if she had meant for him to hear her words. 

  
She shook her head and turned to him, eyes hardening and lips thinning. “Who on Earth gave you the right to be in my rooms without my permission?” She asked in a cold voice, and if her hands hadn’t been shaking Robin may have bought her act.

  
“I apologize, Milady, for trespassing, but I heard a scream and I thought you were being attacked…” He started before she cut him off.

  
“It’s ‘Your Majesty’, and clearly you can see that it’s not the case so I would appreciate it if you would leave me alone to go back to sleep,” she said sharply, and Robin raised his hands and stood up, taking a step back to give her some space.

  
“I truly am sorry, My Queen. I only wanted to protect you.”

  
She looked troubled for a moment, as if she couldn’t wrap her head around his statement. “I don’t need your protection. I can take care of myself,” she stated defiantly, raising her chin, her eyes flashing.

  
“I never doubted that, but it doesn’t mean you have to do everything on your own.” He countered softly.

  
“That’s exactly what it means. Now leave before I make you.” The Queen ordered harshly, and Robin knew a lost battle when he saw one.

  
He nodded, bowed respectfully and walked towards the door, wishing her a goodnight. As he closed the heavy set of double doors behind him, he saw her get up and put on a dressing gown before heading to her balcony. He doubted she would get any more sleep that night.

* * *

His suspicions were confirmed in the morning when he saw her entering the Great Hall for breakfast, wearing more make-up than usual yet not enough to conceal the dark circles under her eyes from his searching ones. Thinking about it, those circles had become more and more pronounced since he came across their group in the forest, after saving the Queen and the Princess from the flying monkey. He wondered if last night had been her first attempt at getting some proper rest.

  
Their gaze met briefly before she turned away, lips curling with distaste. He tried not to take it personally. After all, since they met, he seemed to make it a habit to step behind her carefully erected defences. She most certainly wasn’t used to it.

  
Their paths kept crossing that day, between meals and meetings, but he knew better than to try and talk to her. He was sure if he stepped a toe in her personal space, he would be greeted with one of her infamous fireballs. He settled for watching her from afar until she left the Hall after dinner to go to bed, or so she told the Princess.

  
He had a feeling she wouldn’t go to her rooms that night, probably trying to avoid a repeat from the night before. He tucked Roland into bed after reading him a story and went to look for the Queen.

  
He found her under her great apple tree, still in her full regal attire, hair pinned tightly to her head. It hit him only now that last night had been the first time he had ever seen her hair down and how different she had looked then.

  
He watched over her for a while, hidden from view but able to see her fully as the almost full moon cast some light over the courtyard. At some point, she closed her eyes and some tears rolled down her face. He wondered once more what had happened to this woman, and who she really was behind the myth and all the stories. He had never been one to take what he heard at face value, and what he had heard certainly had nothing to do with what he had seen over the past week. 

  
She didn’t look much like the Evil Queen of infamous reputation, beyond the clothes and the cutting tone, but rather like a woman whose whole world had crumbled around her. A woman who was trying to pick up the pieces without looking weak and vulnerable in the process. A woman who seemed to bear the weight of years of bad decisions with devastating consequences on shoulders more frail than she wished them to be, and who struggled with the thought that maybe she could have forgiveness and didn’t have to put her life on the line to get it.

  
He didn’t know how long he stayed there before she finally stood up and started to head back to the castle. Midway, she froze and turned her head towards him. She sighed and called him out.

  
“You can stop hiding now." 

  
Robin had no idea what gave him away, but this was her castle, and she knew it better than anyone else. She must have her ways.

  
"Do you have a death wish? What are you doing here? You’re not on duty tonight,” she remarked and he smirked a bit at the thought that she knew when he was supposed to do the rounds.

  
She seemed to read his mind, and her eyes narrowed. “Don’t flatter yourself! I’m the Queen, I know everything. Also, Snow whined all evening that she needed company since her Uncharming husband is patrolling with some dwarves.”

  
“I didn’t mean to presume, Your Majesty,” he replied.

  
“You don’t seem to mean much of anything these days,” she countered, one of her brows arching. “You didn’t answer my question. Why were you spying on me?”

  
“I wasn’t spying, only making sure you were alright. It’s not safe to be on ones own when we don’t know what the Wicked Witch is planning.” Robin explained calmly.

  
“So you’re still under the illusion that I need your protection?” Her tone was biting, but Robin could have sworn he saw the corners of her mouth lift up slightly.

  
“One can dream,” he replied.

  
She gave him that troubled look again. “You dream about strange things.”

  
“Like I said yesterday, you don’t have to do everything on your own. You’re in pain, and I have a feeling you have had very few people in your life to share it with.” Robin hazarded, cocking his head to the side, studying her.

  
“So you want to be my confidant? I barely know you.” Regina scoffed, her eyebrows flying up.

  
“Sometimes it’s easier to talk to a stranger,” he said as she shook her head, averting her eyes.

  
“Why do you care so much?” She whispered.

  
Robin sighed. “I just wish you would see that you have allies here. Even some people who understand what you’re going through. I told you about my wife. I know a thing or two about loss, about how it changes you, and makes you feel like you will never be whole again. No one should go through that alone.”

  
She studied him for a long while and then started walking towards the castle again, without saying a word. He remained behind dumbfounded.

  
“Well, what are you waiting for? I thought you were supposed to be my knight in shining armour?” She called back in a caustic tone.

  
He hurried to catch up with her. “So now you need a protector? Anyone ever told you that you’re difficult to follow,” he told her, and she smirked.

  
“What did you expect from the Evil Queen?”

  
They walked in silence until they arrived at a crossing. He knew both ways led to her quarters from his explorations but one route was shorter than the other. She stopped and hesitated, her eyes looking nervously from one corridor to the other before she headed right, taking the longer path.

  
As her door closed between them, with barely another word spoken, he wondered what was in that corridor that could provoke such a reaction.

* * *

  
He got the answer in the morning when he strolled along it after breakfast, and found the Princess Snow White standing in a door frame, looking frozen.

  
He approached her and asked if she was alright.

  
She nodded. “It looks exactly the same. Nothing has moved, no one has been here since he died,” she said, a little shakily.

  
Robin’s eyes widened a little when he understood that they were standing in front of the King’s quarters.

  
“I always wondered why she was always so sad. I thought it was every girl’s dream to be Queen. I never understood, until recently, that this wasn’t the life she wanted. She was forced to live it, and she did the best she could with a bad situation. Well, maybe not the best, but she did what she could to get through it,” Snow White said, her gaze never leaving the bed where her father had died.

She took a deep breath and continued. “My father didn’t love her. He still thought about my mother, and he couldn’t make himself care enough for Regina. I know that now, I see that now. I wish I had been less blind when it mattered. I wish I had helped her,” she shook her head, her reverie ending. “I don’t even know why I’m telling you this,” she added, turning towards him.

  
Robin told her the same thng he told Regina the night before. “Sometimes, it’s easier to talk to a stranger. And if I may say so, Your Highness, children only ever want to see the best in their parents.”

  
Snow White nodded thoughtfully. “David didn’t always understand why I was fighting so hard to get her back. He doesn’t know her the way I do. She was so full of life when I met her, so hopeful, even after … No, that’s not my place to talk about. She is the one who told me about true love, you know. I will never forget her words that night, or the expression on her face.”

  
Robin’s eyebrows raised at this revelation. The more time he spent around the Queen and her strange family, the more layers he uncovered.

  
“Yes, she taught me the most important thing I ever learned in my whole life. The one thing I always clung to, even in the darkest moments. I wish I could help her alleviate the pain.” The Princess’s eyes were shining with tears as she spoke.

  
“Some people need the pain to cope, to remind them they’re alive, that they can still feel. I won’t presume the Queen is one of them, I don’t know her well enough for that, but I recognize the type,” Robin explained. 

  
“You lost someone too, didn’t you? Roland’s mother?” The Princess asked in a low voice and squeezed his arm comfortingly as Robin nodded. “You two have an awful lot in common.” Snow White remarked as she closed the doors to her father’s rooms and left. 

  
Robin looked at the closed doors for a while as he recalled the announcement of King Leopold’s second wedding, and how the people had whispered about the new Queen’s beauty and age. Before she was the Evil Queen, she had been the Child Queen. Robin felt the hatred and disgust rise inside him at the thought of what went on behind those doors. 

  
No wonder she had nightmares.

* * *

  
The next night Robin was abruptly awoken by Roland’s own bout of bad dreams. Since the attack by the flying monkey and the rumours about the Wicked Witch, Roland’s active imagination had been in overdrive to the point that it sometimes troubled his sleep.

  
As Robin reassured his son and coaxed him back to sleep an idea sprouted in his mind. Roland had been curious about the grand lady who had saved him, but very shy in approaching her when he had learnt she was the Evil Queen.

His childhood had been filled with stories about the great and powerful woman who used her magic and her ruthless Black Knights to punish those who protected Snow White, or stood in her way.

  
Even if Robin had explained that she had changed, the boy was still wary and hid behind his father’s legs each time she was near, clutching the plush toy she had given him to his chest. The irony made Robin smile.

  
Maybe he could solve two problems at once. He would have to be careful, but he could make it work.

* * *

  
  
In the days that followed he put himself in the Queen’s way more than usual, appearing with Roland during her walks in the gardens, joining her in the library under the pretence of picking new books for bedtime stories, accompanying her on her way to mealtime. 

  
Robin knew Regina had picked up on his boy’s hesitancy around her, but he hoped those little encounters would help put them both more at ease with each other. If Roland realised the once Evil Queen was on their side, and protecting them from the Wicked Witch, it may soothe his nightmares, and Robin dared to hope that the presence of a child near Regina, even if painful at first, could distract her a bit. Roland, when at ease, had a unique way of making the lives of people around him brighter.

  
It took time, but little by little, Robin saw progress. 

  
Roland, who tried to peek at a book Regina was reading, while she pretended not to notice but still oriented it just a tiny bit to the side so he could see it better. 

  
Regina, who was picking apples from her tree, standing on her tip toes, complaining out loud that she wasn’t tall enough to reach the fruit, and Roland, always eager to help, saying that if he sat on his father’s shoulders he could do it.

  
Roland, shyly offering a beautiful thorn less rose to a lost in her thoughts Queen, startling her a bit with his simple but oh so lovely gift and getting a tearful smile from her as he whispered “Thank you for saving me”.

  
Little things, day after day, and Roland had fewer nightmares, but the circles under the Queen’s eyes were still very present, and Robin wondered when she would collapse from exhaustion.

  
He was racking his brain to find a solution when it was handed to him on a plate. Now that things were more settled at the castle, some people expressed their intentions to regain their former lands and the Prince wanted to organize a reconnaissance mission to see if it was safe enough. He asked for the Merry Men’s help since they knew the area in question better than anyone. 

Robin would have to leave Roland overnight, but he knew just who to trust with the task of tending to his boy, and he wished she would agree.

  
He shamelessly used his son to get her to say yes. Roland, who had considerably warmed up to Regina, had heard from the Princess Snow White that the Queen told the best bedtime stories, and the boy had been aghast at the thought that someone could do that better than his papa. 

  
The little outlaw approached her to ask if she could read him a story when his father was away so he could compare. Regina’s eyebrows flew up as she sent a surprised look Robin’s way. He only shrugged and indicated he didn’t have any problem with it.

  
No one could resist Roland’s puppy eyes and dimples. The Queen was no exception.

  
In the morning, when Robin left with his Men and the Prince, he couldn’t help but smile at the sight of Roland’s little hand gently grasping one of Regina’s as they were seeing the group off.

  
When he came back, as dawn was breaking two days later, he directly went to Roland’s room, and what met his eyes warmed his heart in a way he had rarely felt before. 

The Queen was lying on the edge of the bed, as if unsure that she was allowed to stay there, but Roland apparently hadn’t cared about her qualms since he was resting half on her, half on his bed, with his head raising up and down with each breath Regina took. 

They both looked peaceful, and Robin turned around, closing the door with no intention to disturb them. 


End file.
